Just another day

I felt naceous. I could hear the ventilation going. The room didn't feel hot, it felt as if we were stuck in time instead. I could really feel my stomach. I kept on wishing to be alone. In front of me a girl whose hair kept on falling in top of my notebook. Next to me a guy who insisted on talking to me despite having the speaker directly facing us. Behind me two guys I wish I hadn't invited to be there and the rest of the places filled with people I just wish could disappear. Perhaps it was easier just for me to be gone. 

I went back to my office and I felt the same about the people there. Why were they there? One of the guys working seemed to have what could have been easily mistaken with pneumonia, yet he refused to leave, as if having to stare at his computer became easier at our office rather than his house. 

There were just too many days like these. I didn't like anyone. I wanted to be alone but not completely alone. I wanted to feel loved and understood and be able to lay down, leave all my armament behind. I was just so fragile. I wanted to feel strong. 

I kept on waiting for it to be 6pm. The door rang unexpectedly. Someone pretending to be nice to me made me feel better. I like being falsely nice to people as well. At the same time I hated people who were falsely nice. 

Perhaps it wasn't just the conference room that was stuck in time, there are just way too many days like these.